MONO Lessons (Part XVIII: 366 - 382)

Meditatively Obtained, Novel, and Observational (MONO) Lessons

366. The more I think about it, the more I want nothing to do with anything Mormon.

367. I need somebody to type my autobiography while I just blab away about my bizarre and somewhat heartbreaking past.

368. I don’t believe in “love at first sight.”  However, I’m a strong believer in “like at first sight” and an even stronger believer in “lust at first sight.”

369. I have some unresolved issues with him.

370. She can hold out for a whole month!

371. I’m acting like a teenager and I’m fine with it.

372. Daiquiri Ice is DAIRY FREE!

373. Physics is more phun when I can phocus on it.

374. If I need a new kidney, YOU are waking up in an ice bath. Just sayin’…

375. I'm pretty rational about flying off the handle. – AEW

376. When I’m annoyed, I can’t hide it.

377. Don’t have the ice cream.  Just don’t.

378. The best part about having a boyfriend is he goes to every freaking concert with me.  ☺

379. When finally confronted with a question you’ve been waiting to be asked for years, it can catch you so off guard that you freeze up and avoid answering it the way you’ve rehearsed a million times in your head.

380. 1982 Tron = AWFUL!  Seriously.  Did Disney really release that to the general public?

381. I have never found a human being more repugnant, cowardly, and disgraceful than those two and I haven’t even met them.

382. Somebody dislikes Halloween more than I. And that’s saying something.

Mono Lessons (Part I: 1-24)

And so begins the posting of my "Mono Lessons." As I mentioned earlier, I have a whole gigantic list of these written, so I will post them in smaller spurts.

I believe a lot of people who will be reading these are either specifically mentioned or alluded to in my "lessons." This could get rather interesting.

You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll thank God you don't have mono.

1. It is difficult to stay healthy long enough to qualify for a flu vaccination.

2. It is so much more convenient and comfortable to breathe out of your nose. Hence, it is very likely to become addicted (literally) to nasal spray.

3. Your true friends are the ones who stick around knowing you haven’t been yourself for months on end.

4. Antibiotics for “sinus infections” will cause hives when you have mono. I guess it didn’t help that I also didn’t actually have a sinus infection in the first place.

5. Hives will get out of control if you don’t take an antihistamine and/or put Cortizone 10 on them as soon as you feel an outbreak occurring.

6. I’m allergic to Bactrim and Ceftin.

7. Mono will slow down room rearrangement projects…greatly.

8. Getting your blood drawn can actually be a non-horrific experience.

9. Being “too tired” is apparently only legitimate if you have a blood test to back it up.

10. Endless amounts of jokes can be made about mono all because someone decided to call it the “kissing disease.” Only thing is, it’s endless amounts of the SAME joke.

11. It is unbelievably hard for me to ask for less responsibility.

12. I hadn’t realized how emotionally invested I am/was in the UTemps Program. I had never bawled over taking time off before. It was devastating.

13. Bowling IS a sport.

14. I could actually be skinnier than I was.

15. What true nausea is.

16. Empathy for:

a. Mom

b. Dad

c. Sherri

d. Kelsey

e. Deanna

17. What fatigue is.

18. How much a pleasant memory is worth.

19. Boys can wait.

20. Most things can wait.

21. I can wait.

22. People can change. And those changed people will continue to surprise you.

23. Shattered friendships can begin to heal.

24. Some friendships need to end…or at least take a break.