Meditatively Obtained, Novel, and Observational (MONO) Lessons

420. I don’t know what to do with my last name if/when I get married.  But I do know “Hoggan” won’t be leaving.  It’s far too awesome.

421. I want an equation, variable, or unit named after me.  “Then we take the Hoggan Cross Section…”  “Find the Hoggan wavelength of…”  “So after the algebra, we are left with 7 Hoggans…”  Yes.

422. Opera is not my thing.

423. “Little Women” is just a boring story.  Jo, grow up.

424. I should probably become a model.  It may be my true calling in life.

425. Depressed and anxious people shouldn’t have to split their depression and anxiety pills. We need more size variety!

426. Seeing a car flip over in front of you due to another car running a red light causes intersection anxiety.

427. I’m in love.  He drives me insane, but I love him.  I’m in love.

428. I can go months without talking to someone and still know when they’re pulling an April Fools joke.

429. Gay marriage would be legal if it weren’t illegal.  Think about it.  That thought isn’t as stupid as it sounds.

430. Fortune cookies are disgusting.

431. Domes of fudge are splendid.

432. Hemorrhoids suck.

433. Sucker Punch…possibly too awesome?

434. Buckwheat is nasty.  Even in maple-glazed cold cereal form.

435. I will never need to purchase an obnoxiously large, loud, and window-tinted truck to make up for any lack of “manhood,” thank you.

436. I don’t drink enough water.

437. I’m a meat-eating vegan.  A carnivorous vegan, if you will.  …Aaaaaand you will.

438. When I get an intense blog idea, move out of the way.

439. I like butt chins.